Introduction and Theory of Mind
Within pop psychology there is a myriad of information on individuals on the autism spectrum. Thus, there is no doubt vast misconceptions within the public regarding those on the spectrum. Informally, ASD (autism spectrum disorder) is generally characterized by misunderstandings of social etiquette. Generally, stereotypical behaviors of those on the spectrum are more-or-less accurate (Gevezova et al., 2023). Interestingly, genetic components with respect to ASD are somewhat enigmatic, though there are some known biomedical markers – for instance epigenetics (Gevezova et al., 2023). In a YouTube video, a renown expert in the field and a former therapist, Jodi Carlton mentioned that neurodiverse individuals tend to think in black and white ways. Opposed to neurotypical individuals who are generally able to think between the lines, neurodiverse folks have a more rigid way of thinking (2024) and this is consistent with stereotypes.
Dealing with a neurodivergent individual can sometimes be challenging. That being said, it’s important for one to, at the very least, put one in another’s shoes and try living the life of one who is neurodivergent. To put things into a computational metaphor, there can exist a mismatch of operating systems between a neurodivergent (ND) individual and a neurotypical (NT) individual. There will be a few steps in understanding relationships between a ND individual and a NT individual. For starters, it’s not uncommon for ND individuals to fixate on a topic. ND individuals might shut down when overwhelmed.
One can consider the fact that a ND individual might be the potentially targeted prey for certain individuals.
Understanding “Alexithymia” will allow one to understand how a ND individual (originally, a psychiatric patient) has difficulty understanding emotions. Some characteristics associated with Alexithymia include difficulty describing or identifying one’s emotions, difficulty in differentiating sensations caused from an individual’s emotions and one’s feelings (Tsubaki & Shimizu, 2024). In addition, one with Alexithymia might have a stunted imagination. Research has found a correlation between Alexithymia and anxiety and depression (Preece et al., 2024 as cited by Tsubaki & Shimizu, 2024).
Philosophy and First-Person Physicalism
Perhaps one of the most interesting things to me is the theory of mind. First, in academic philosophy there exists hard solipsism. Solipsism is the idea that an individual is the only conscious mind – this is fundamentally egotistical in nature, but it is also a monist position. One might say that a solipsist is an idealist. They believe that no other beings exist out in the real world. This idea comes from the fact that one cannot prove that others exist. Solipsism is generally not taken particularly seriously outside of niche academic communities. Honestly, many academics [perhaps rightfully] dismiss solipsism as a serious option ontologically.
The problem of many minds is also a fun problem to think about within the Philosophy of Mind. Philosophers try to think about questions such as why am I having this experience (whatever experience you are having right now) opposed to another and, if there are a multitude of other copies of you out there, why are you having this one unique experience at this time in space. We needn’t go too deep. We can go one level above and contemplate that there is no way that I can get into another person’s first-person perspective. For instance, I will and can never know how my younger sister sees the color red and she would never be able to see red through my eyes. Subjectiveness (what it’s like to be) is sometimes classified under physicalism and this is a major and hot topic in the philosophy of physics. All of this goes to the topic of this post. That is, someone on the (autism) spectrum naturally has a hard time putting themselves into the shoes of a neurotypical (NT) individual and it’s tough to relate to others.
Asperger Syndrome
Individuals who are diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome (AS) often have difficulty with social situations. Individuals with AS are technically classified to be on the autism spectrum. Oftentimes, those with AS have an average or above average intelligence. Due to one with AS’s lack of social awareness, lack of social cues, et cetera there are relational issues which can and do intuitively occur (Woodbury-Smith & Volkmar, 2009 as cited by Luchini, 2026). Much like others on the autism spectrum, more often than not, those with AS take words at face value (Lovett, 2005).NT individuals may not recognise and fully appreciate that one with AS suffer from a neurological disorder and thus their (AS individual) brain is wired differently (Lovett, 2005). Asperger Syndrome (and how said individuals relate to the world) might be the main topic of a future blog post.
Double Blind Empathy and Cassandra Syndrome: Issues Between ND and NT Individuals
Empathy is likely to occur between one who shares similarity with another individual (opposed to between two individuals who do not share things in common) (Komeda et al., 2019). The double blind empathy problem states that, while autistic individuals struggle to understand NT individuals, NT individuals fail to fully understand ND individuals (Milton, 2012 as cited by Watts et al., 2024). There is a parallel between double blind empathy and Cassandra Syndrome. Cassandra Syndrome (also known as Ongoing Traumatic Relationship Syndrome (OTRS)) (Luchini, 2026) can be used to specifically describe relationships wherein one partner is a NT individual and the other is ND. OTRS describes the process whereby a NT individual can (potentially) become [physiologically] sick from the dynamics of a relationship with a ND individual. In the interpretation of a ND individual (and due to their black and white thinking), One criticism of Cassandra Syndrome is there exists a lack of empirical evidence and academic research on OTRS (Luchini, 2026).
Intuitively, in the case of relationships between NT and ND individuals, strain can be put on a partner (specifically with the NT individual). The NT individual might feel isolated due to the ND individual’s lack of understanding or ability to deal with their emotions.A key difference between PTSD and OTRS is that the latter includes distress that is continuous, whereas the distress in the former is in the past (Vandervoort & Rokach, 2003 as cited by Luchini, 2026).
There is a great deal of stress brought onto a NT and ND relationship.
Chronic relational stress, particularly within the home environment, can be just as damaging—if not more so—than single-event trauma due to its cumulative and inescapable nature. The lack of formal recognition of OTRS within psychiatric and psychological diagnostic frameworks has contributed to widespread misunderstanding, professional neglect, and lack of adequate support for affected individuals.
Conclusion: The Basic Gist
Being in a relationship with a ND individual can potentially create distress. There are solutions. One important aspect is obtaining diagnoses. When one knows what one is dealing with, one can better address whatever it may be.